The Ayudante: A Romantic Goldmine
By Miriam Pope
Ladies: if you’re looking for some sweet lovin while in Guatemala, we would like to direct your attention to a generally overlooked man-hunting hotspot: the chicken bus.
Even before entering the chicken bus, listen for that striking voice that hollers the bus’s destination 27 times in 2 minutes. Then observe as that same gentleman grabs you and practically shoves you inside his bus. Once abroad, monitor this Indiana Jones of Guatemalan transport as he risks his life to scale up the moving vehicle, grab your stuff, and be waiting at the door, backpack in hand- all before the bus stops.
Because it’s this hunk- the ayudante– that makes the chicken bus a haven for potential Latin love! Derived from the Spanish verb ayudar– to help, the ayudante assists travelers, and so much more. You owe it to yourself to take another glance at these grand helpers. Here’s why:
If you’re already impressed by the performance of an ayudante on the bus, imagine him off the bus! Consider the way in which an ayudante finagles his body through the masses in order to collect bus fares. Imagine that ability on the dance floor, or even in the bedroom!
Recall those life-threatening moments when the ayudante keeps his cool, no matter that the bus is going 87 MPH, around blind corners, in the dark, on a dirt road/cliff. The ayudante is a guaranteed low-drama boyfriend.
He is damn smart. At a bus stop, say 13 people get on, 6 get off and 8.5 (.5 = baby on back) switch seats, all simultaneously. An ayudante isn’t confused by this. He can instantly recall who paid, who didn’t pay, and who still needs change for their 100Q bill. With that memory, he is sure not to forget to your birthday!
Ayudantes are not typically applauded for their fashion sense. But we beg to differ in this sentiment. Confidence is in these days, and as such, ayudantes are like fashion gods. Imagine being with a man confident enough to flaunt his chest hair in an unbuttoned, plaid shirt, tennis shoes and rad 70s glasses. Top that off with over-gelled hair and starred teeth- a sure way to get you rolling your rrrrrs.
So ladies, jump on a bus today to find your Guatemalan romance. Ayudantes are sure to help you out; both on and off the chicken bus.