WITP: Making Out in Public
By Elena Alvarado
With the month of love upon us, Why is This Popular delves into a commonly observed phenomena in Xela: people making out in public. Public squares, parks, alleys, doorways, bus stops, almost anywhere you look you’re likely to see some amorous couple exchanging longing hugs, passionate kisses, or more (most of you probably stop looking once you recognize what’s going on, not WITP- but we’ll spare you the details- okay fine, if you insist: this one time in that sunken garden part of the Central Park… [censored]… straight into the air). Anyway enough of the gory details, here are some theories on why making out in public is popular:
1. Guatemalan beds are really uncomfortable: Given the choice between a terribly uncomfortable bed (those of you staying with host families can identify) or a nice soft park bench, where would you rather be making out? Correct, nine out of ten times the bench wins. Besides there is a reduced risk of bedbugs in the park.
2. No time to waste: Life is short so when you meet Mr. or Mrs. Right there is no time to lose. That long walk home would definitely put a damper on the mood (and buzz), so better to save time by taking advantage of that convenient nice dark alley.
3. Increased chance of a three-some: Getting it on with one person is nice, but the more the merrier. Making out in public is an open invitation for others to join in the fun. If you were in private then how would anyone else be able to spontaneously get in on the action?
4. Love hotels are expensive: Sure the hourly rates at hotels catering to lovers sound reasonable at first, but they really start to add up over time. With limited means, and a great thirst for beer, that Q50 can be spent in more efficient ways than taking your loving indoors.
5. Guatemalan Viagra: Getting it on with others watching is the best way to increase the excitement in your love life and much cheaper than more clinically proven alternatives. Plus you don’t have to worry about the side effects, if it lasts more than 6 hours you can just pack up and go home.
So there you have it, all great and entirely plausible reasons for the popularity of the public hook up. Keep this in mind as you and that special person think about how to physically manifest your love on Valentine’s Day.